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A letter to the makers of men's cologne:
Please, PLEASE urge men to only use one squirt (2 at the most) of your product. Using any more than this may cause friends/loved ones/co-workers to gag. Uncontrollably. I feel a disclaimer on the back of the bottle is warranted. Please write me back and let me know when this has been taken care of. Sincerely yours, Pencils and Heels.
A letter to wearers of men's cologne:
Please, PLEASE only use one squirt (2 at the most) of cologne. By using multiple squirts, you are inducing headaches and ruining tastebuds. You may be the most gentle of men, but really you are doing yourself a disservice because no one will ever want to get close to you. And those who have no choice but to be close to you, will be flaming angry and unable to focus. Perhaps no one has had the courage to tell you that you are using too much, so as a general rule of thumb, squirt once and END IT! For crying out loud, you stink! Sincerely yours, Pencils and Heels.
5 comments:
I don't think he even knows. Sad.
Perhaps though, we can take solace in the fact that the unmentioned offender has Beyonce as his ring-tone.
I know that doesn't help the smell, but it's flippin' awesome all the same.
:-)
Right. I agree. "Beyonce ring-tone" is a lovely man. I would hate for others to dismiss him because of the cologne.
figgin' hilarious :)
(regardless if I really know the intended recipient of letter #2 or not...)
it's still funny.
ditto the letter on to little old grannies.
Hehehe. That made me laugh.
p.s. Kylee, I used the word "squirt" for you! :)
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